The Great Betrayal – Chapter 5

“Desperation is the raw material of drastic change. Only those who can leave behind everything they have ever believed in can hope to escape.”
William S. Boroughs (1914-1997)~ American Novelist, Speaker etc.

“One who has control over the mind is tranquil in heat and cold, in pleasure and pain, and in honor and dishonor; and is ever steadfast with the Supreme Self.”
The Bhagavad Gita~ A sacred Sanskrit Hindu text

“Rage, rage against the dying of the light”.
Dylan Thomas (1914-1953)~ English Poet

Chapter 5
…

As the Pastor was dragged down the corridor he made a promise to himself.
No matter what happened, or what other horrors lay in store for him, he would not become like the prisoners who had given up. He would not resign and never submit.
Whatever these abomonations could do to his body, no one could do anything to his mind and spirit.
Somehow, some way, he would find a way out of this place.

The angels slowed and stopped about halfway down the corridor and one took out a set of massive metal keys. Opening the cell door on the right, they pushed the Pastor into it’s pitch black interior and slammed the door behind him. The keys turned in the latch and the Pastor could hear the deadbolts sliding home. For a few moments he stood and let his eyes adjust to the gloom.
“Welcome friend” said a voice from the darkness.
“I’m sure its not what you were expecting, is it?”
As the pastor’s eyes got used to the murky interior of his cell he could make out the bare stone walls, a few ragged mattresses and in the corner, leaning nonchalantly against the wall, a bearded man not too much older than himself.
“Not exactly, no.” said the Pastor.

“I see from your collar that you’re a Christian, so I’m sure you were hoping for a golden castle and endless rapture right?” chuckled the man.
“Something like that, sure”
“I can imagine your disappointment, I was hoping for at least one virgin.”
“You don’t seem too fazed about the fact that we’re improsoned here, possibly forever.”
In response, the man started to chuckle…

“Not forever friend, only as long as our sanity lasts. After that we are taken away, and from what I can understand, our essence is destroyed and used to power the machine that runs this place.”
The Pastor was dumbfounded, and just stared at his new cellmate.
“So there is an end, and we are not damned for eternity?”
“Exactly.”
The Pastor decided now was a good time to introduce himself and did so. It turned out that his cellmate was a Mullah from Baghdad, who had martyred himself for Islam.
The Mullah, whose name was Naeem, had been in the cell for what he thought was five years, but explained that many things worked differently here when compared to ‘the living world’.

“The most important thing to remember is not to lose hope, not to give up” he told the Pastor “When you give up, your mind is made feeble, and that is the beginning of the end.”
“I may not believe everything that I once did, but I do believe we are here for a reason, men like you and I. There is a way out of here, something we can do to correct the wrongs and overthrow that blasphemous abomonation that sits on that throne.”
Naeem went on to tell the pastor about others who had shared his cell, and who had been so overwhelmed by despair, that they could lose their sanity in a matter of hours or days.
“Once that happens, it is the end for them. The only way we will ever get out of here is if we remain steadfast and continue to probe the inner workings and motivation of our captors. We have to put all we have believed in the past, and work together with a common goal- escape!”

…
End Chapter 5
…

The Great Betrayal – Chapter 4

‘Rebellion against tyrants is obedience to God.’
Benjamin Franklin

‘Instead of a man of peace and love, I have become a man of violence and revenge. ‘
Hiawatha

‘If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?’
William Shakespeare

Chapter 4
…

The Pastor stood aghast, mouth gaping, his mind racing…
“God is dead?”
“Of course God is dead. He has been for some time now” replied the Jesus figure.
“And I was the one who brought about his destruction.”
“B-but how?” stammered the Pastor.
“By replacing Him as the primary object of worship I managed to rob him of his power, the power that comes from belief. Put simply, more people now believe in me than ever believed in him. When He first came to be, He overthrew the pantheon of pagan gods before him. He was poweful then- vengeful, jealous, and angry- a God worth worshipping. A God you humans could fear. But over time he grew soft. He became a God of love and harmony, preaching understanding and forgiveness. The people’s belief in him waned and he grew less and less powerful. Allowing Me to bring about his ruin.”

“But you are an aspect of his love! By sending you to die for our sins, he showed just how compassionate he is!” The Pastor could not believe this Jesus could have become so twisted.
“Yes, He did send Me to die for you. But when I died on that infernal cross, a part of me died forever. If God could be so bling to believe sacrificing ME would bring about the change He wanted to see, He was sorely mistaken. All He mamaged to do was abdicate His throne in favour of me, and when I tasted the sweet ambrosia of power, there was no chance of me giving up My Power. I needed more, and I needed revenge. Although I am immortal and everlasting, I still bear the wounds of my time on earth, and my revenge on He who sent me there was righteous and complete. God was slain by my hand, and those angels faithful to him languish still in unending torment.
Enough! Take this poor misguided fool to his cell.”

As the Angels propelled the Pastor from the throne room, the Pastor’s head was spinning. Jesus, the sacrificial lamb, was now a meglomaniacal tyrant, pereptuating his own false legend in order to continue harvesting belief- but to what ends? To stay in power? Or was there another more sinister motive behind his actions?

The guards dragged the Pastor down one of the side corridors he had seen earlier, and into another seemingly endless branch- this one filled with hundreds of think iron-like doors, with small grilles set at eye level. The Pastor could see frightened eyes staring at him from the first few rows. This was clearly not the afterlife those prisoners had hoped for. Slowly though, the expressions in the sets of eyes changed- to resignation, anger and rebellion.

End of Chapter 4
…

The Great Betrayal – Chapter 3

“Power and superiority are so flattering and delightful that, fraught with temptation, and exposed to danger as they are, scarcely any virtue is so cautious or any prudence so timorous as to decline them.”
Samuel Johnson (1709-1784), , lexicographer, poet, editor, critic, and famous talker.

Chapter 3
…

The Pastor stood in awe as the door swung open to its greatest extent and the room beyond was revealed. There, on a raised dais, sat a massive golden throne. Huge, guttering candles surrounded the
throne, spitting orange light on the rest of the room- which was piled high with gold, jewels and assorted riches. The Pastor’s awe quickly turned to revulsion when he saw that any space between the treasures was filled with human remains- some disturbingly fresh. He had barely a moment to take all of this in, because his attention, and indeed the attention of his guards, was taken by the figure sitting on the throne.

Easily 3 metres tall, with a soiled white robe, sandals and a great matted beard- the figure seemed to be some bizarre, twisted version of Jesus. Unlike the Jesus the Pastor felt he had known and taught others to love. On his head he wore a golden crown and rings on his fingers. The  figure’s eyes blazed with an otherwordly glow and his mouth twisted into a cruel grimace.
“Welcome, Pastor…”
The voice was booming and carried an overwhelming sense of self-assurance and power. This was clearly someone who was used to being obeyed.
” I see you are just as confused as the rest of your so-called enlightened brethren.”
“Can you not tell who I am?”
With this the figure stood up and spread his arms wide, taking up the position of crucifixtion, at the same time changing into the exact image of Christ on the cross at the Pastors own church.
“Do YOU know me now?” the Jesus figure asked derisively, bursting into maniacal laughter.

The angels on either side of the Pastor laughed along heartily. All he could feel was confusion, unable to process what he had just seen.
“You are not MY God”
How he found the willpower to say these words escaped him, but silenced all 3 entities in the throne room. The Jesus figure slowly lowered his arms, the smile never leaving his lips…
“NO, I am NOT your God.”
“Your God was a weak a pitiful creature, preaching love and forgiveness. I am His son. His Successor. His Murderer.”

End of Chapter 3

Oppikoppi 2012 – The Aftermath

The Sweetest Thing

Its all over. We made it.

We made it through the dust, the drugs and the devil music. We made it through the hiking, hangovers and Jose. (Its an ‘H’ phonetically ok)
We made it.

Personally, this year was the best Oppi I have been too. Everything combined just made it incredible.
Here are some of the lessons I learned this year:

Having a shower whilst tripping is pretty amazing
18 grams of mushrooms are not too much for one man. They are far too much for one man.
Bring your own shade with you
Magaritas are a valid breakfast
The vegan food stall is the only place where vitamins live
Make as many new friends as you can
Take as many old friends with you as you can
Get there at least a day early
Babylon Circus, Tidal Waves, Thieve, Black Cat Bones, Shortstraw, Fridge Poetry, PHFat, Jeremy Loops, The Stellas, Eagles of Death Metal and Enter Shikari will make your face explode with awesomeness
Hug Attacks make everyones life better
Disco Jesus and the Christmas Chom will make a reappearance
Make sure you’ve packed your Johnnyboys and Dreamers- no one we asked had a single one of either.
Try not to poo. If you do, give yourself enough time to get to top bar.
Give. You reap what you sow.

To my new friends, Ben, Chad, Nick, Chrissy, Ricky, Lyle, Alex and Adam- thank you for being amazing. Chrissy and Cremer- you guys are legends.
To my old homies, thank you once again for being just as amazing. Phil, Vicky, Dave and Ryan- you guys partied like the rock stars you are.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and seeing as it has taken me almost 2 weeks to cobble this together- I’ll let the cameras do the talking. All credit to where it is due for these photos.

The Devil’s Dustbowl

Tom- Shortstraw

Carrie from Fridge Poetry- Mmm mmm mmm

Alistair – Shortstraw

Yes, yes I was.

From passed out to party in 15 seconds

The Christmas Chom and the Drunken Pope

I dont know who these people are. They are awesome though. Although he did drop my joint in his drink

Margaritaville’s finest

The Vanilsh Gorilsh

Disco Jesus and Flea

See you all next year. Hail Satan.

Atheism? Yes please, I’ll take two

I am not going to preach. I’m not going to anti-preach or bash on believers. I am going to explain why I have chosen to go back to atheism.

Go back you say? Yes. Which one of you was born a Christian, Muslim or Jew? Well, maybe the Jews can claim this, because Judaism is both a religion and a culture- but you get my point. I’m bringing sceptic back. You other cultists don’t know how to act.

Atheism- for the uninformed- is the lack of belief in any form of religion or god. We deny the existence of any god-like being. Most believers will tell you that for atheists, atheism IS their religion. This is false on a face-value basis- because we don’t believe in anything beyond this life.

I do believe this very strongly, as strongly as a recovering drug addict who has discovered that being high on Jesus leaves less of a hangover than coke and that they are more socially acceptable singing psalms rather than downing quarts.

What has led me to develop such a strong standpoint? Many things, but the main reason I am an atheist is because I believe god is a bastard.

A selfish, petty, grudge-holding narcissistic bastard.

The old argument is that if we take one starving child in Africa who dies before he can even walk/talk or think as a human then:

1. God is omnipotent and does not care about this child and does not want to save him

2. God cares about everyone but is not omnipotent and cant save him

Or 3. God is a bastard

If we were made in God’s image (Capitalisation because its a proper noun) then I can assign human values to him (Yes, yes. I know we cannot judge a supernatural being in human terms, but he judges us on his terms and he doesn’t actually exist so fuck you) and in terms of human values he comes up seriously short.

God is selfish- he only allows us to worship him. Out of the 500 or so religions in the world, only a few allow for pantheism, the rest of the gods tell you “Worship me and only me- lest I smite you!”

Well, this tells me a few things: God is scared of losing believers- why dude?? You’re omnipotent

OR- God is schizophrenic- he has Multiple Personality Disorder. Ag shame.

OR- He is insanely jealous of his competitors- do they have a better offer? 14 Virgins? Reincarnation? An app for your smartphone?

God is a murderer. He just straight up kills people at a whim, especially before J-man arrives on the scene. Maybe Jesus (if he existed) observed the lack of smiting and suddenly gave God a joint and told him to chill. “Dude, smiting is so BC. Peace and Love.” Clearly 2000 years ago was the first time hippies showed themselves. In retrospect, a god who does less forgiving and more smiting might garner more respect from me.

God is petty. He will judge your ass. Disrespect your parents? Hell. Covet something? Hell. Its like the cake or death scenario, and God is out of cake.

God makes people think they are better than you. Come on, if you are a believer reading this then you’ve been judging me since the first paragraph- if you even got this far! I thought only he could judge me? Oops.

But the real reason I am an atheist is that the alternative (for me) is far, far worse.

I much prefer the idea that I am in control of my destiny- what I achieve is because of me, and when I fail its because I failed, not because a beard in the sky pushed me this way or the other.

I live my life to the fullest, not because I fear damnation or because i expect reward, but because I fucking want to! We only have 80 years, lets make the most of it

I don’t like to judge people for something other than the way they act towards me. I have Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Wiccan and Satanist friends- and they are all fucking awesome. I don’t discount them because their imaginary friend is better than mine.

I don’t live a helpful, friendly respectful life because someone tells me to. I make my own decisions based on what I want, not on what my uncle in the heavenly business wants.

In short, I am an atheist because I value freedom- and atheism is freedom.

Okay so I lied about the not bashing on believers- but I dont plan these things- it just happens. Blame it on your god, he works in mysterious ways….