Damn the Man, Save the Bohemian

My friends, we are under attack. Our way of life is being threatened and we are reaching the point of no return.
We as fans of live music perpetrated by more than one man and a computer are being discriminated against.
Our scene, our beloved scene is being whittled away by the powers that be and soon, we will be no more.

This is the sad truth of living in Johannesburg today.
When I started going to live gigs over a decade ago, there were almost more venues than gigging bands- we had awesome places like Roxys (OK, maybe not that awesome), Purple Turtle, The Doors, Cool Runnings, Tokyo Star v1.0 and many others- today we have The Bohemian, Rumours and The Buck and Hog in Joburg, and a handful more in the East and Pretoria.

While our bands and artists are getting more and more talented, their outlets for expression of their music is dwindling. And its your fault.
Yes, you!

You, who only listen to bands who play a certain genre
You, who fork out hundreds of rands to watch an international band so far past their prime they are coughing dust on stage
You, who wont pay R 50 to watch three local bands
You, who has better things to do

At the end of the day, the owners of these venues, no matter how passionate they are about music, need to put food on the table- and if they aren’t making money they have to take action. And us rock kids, being genuine salt of the earth motherfuckers, don’t mind partying in a dingy low-ceilinged bar, whereas the ‘pop’ kids need over 8 laser lights and ‘fwame-froewers’ to jam out with their clams out- so these venues get sold, converted into coffee shops and businesses and we lose another place to play.

One of Joburgs great venues- great in terms of history and personality, not sound quality or decor – The Bohemian – Is in danger of closing down.
It is Johannesburg’s 3rd oldest pub, and was established in its current form in 1983. Thats as old as me, and I have spent at least half of my life attending and playing gigs at ‘The Boh’

We owe it to ourselves as the Joburg Rock Crew to at least try to stop the closure of the Boh. We need venues, we need a place to meet each other, we need the cheap draughts and pool tables, we need venues. We need venues. We. Need. Venues.

Who reading this does not have at least one story or memory from the Boh? I remember smoking a blunt and drinking a bottle of whiskey outside the Boh with Pat O’Gorman a week before he died. I remember playing a gig there and having two girls make out on stage- much more entertaining than our songs at the time. I remember watching my friend Cami go from being a clumsy kid to an accomplished musician on that stage. I remember my friend Greg mixing our show so drunk he couldn’t even see the stage. I remember streaking down the street and later hooking up with a fellow streaker. I remember reconnecting with old friends, meeting new ones and stopping hating my brother in the Boh.

I don’t want these to be my last memories of the Boh. We may be able to stop this, and save a venue- nay, an Empire.

Damn the Man, Save the Boh

Music to Move You

I was having a discussion with some friends the other night- a conversation about people. It started when we discussed online dating and long-distance relationships, and became more clear as we talked about planned parenthood and varying LSM’s.

We realised we are incredibly clever people. Like super smart. With diverse interests and well thought out opinions. You should date us.

But that’s not what this post is about. This post is about common ground.
You see, if you have ever had the (mis)fortune of trawling for prawns on an online dating site, or even if your parents met through a ‘lonely hearts club’ type organisation, I will bet you good money that at least 95% of the ‘Likes’ section of that person’s page will list either music, movies or both.

How original, you are entertained by entertainment, congratulations, you are human.

Have you ever heard of anyone who does not like at least one of those things? Besides maybe some extremists like the Amish, but even then I’ll bet you they jam our to washboard folk or something similar. You see music in particular does something to the very core of our being, it resonates with our soul and can leave blazing white-hot trails of emotion down our spine. It fuels us, and it inspires us, it can change the way we see the world.
Movies can also do this, but whereas I love Horror movies, many of my friends can’t stand them- but we all love Creedence and Queen. Music is a lot more universal than film.

One of my friends has a brother who doesn’t like music, except for some classical. And that’s ok. I don’t want to be left alone in a room with him, but I think we can still classify him as human. However, there was one gem I found online when I experimented with online dating. This girl had a fairly attractive photo (headshot only), and seemed to be intelligent, but there were 3 signs I should have taken note of:
1. She was/is an accountant
Accountants are important to business, but honestly I would rather have a party in a damp paper bag than go to dinner at an all accounting schindig. Oh and to those of you who are reading this that are accountants I’m sorry, I love you guys, I promise I will give you a big table of numbers to add up later
2. She did not like movies
At all. Not even ‘The Notebook’ or ‘The Land Before Time’ or ‘Forrest Gump’
Weird. Everyone reading this likes at least one of those movies, unless you are bodysnatchers from Dimension X (Say hi to Krang and the Neutrinos for me)
3. She DID NOT LIKE MUSIC
Nothing, nada, not even Enya or Yanni. No Simon and Garfunkle, no Beethoven. No Bob Marley, no Damien Rice.

This was a problem, because as we engaged over email and once on the phone, I was suspecting she had the personality of a sock.
The phone call confirmed it. Pretty enough girl, good education and career, but I would rather hit myself in the face with Justin Bieber than date someone who I can’t share music with.

Imagine your favourite song comes on, you’re on a roadtrip to a beach holiday and your favourite person is next to you. Dont you already want to sing into their faces with them? Wouldnt that be awesome right now?

So my message to you is to allow music to move you, let it nourish your inner humanity, and let your passion runneth over- Sing!